finally

So we had the adoption hearing this morning and you know what? It's all good.

We are now the proud parents of a 7-year-old boy. The only parents of a 7-year-old boy.

The guardian ad litem? Turned out to be a champ. Apparently, Sunday was just an off day. She handled the hearing like she was Perry Mason in a floral-print dress. But both Nature Boy and I had to testify about our relationship, our families, our history and our income. And let me tell you, that kind of messes with your mind. Because you start to question things you know. Like how long you've lived in your own house (me) and when you got married (Nature Boy).

I was still so flustered that when I had to fill out the forms to have the Ubergoober's birth certificate changed I couldn't do it. Seriously. I messed up six forms trying to get it done. I messed up Nature Boy's birth date, the county we live in, my ex's name... everything. Nature Boy finally had to do it, which proves how much he loves me because that was one of our wedding vows. I vowed to fill out any and all forms, legal or otherwise, and he vowed to put the registration sticker on my license plate every year. Well, not our real wedding vows that we made in front of the judge, but the vows that you make before you get married, the promises you make to each other so that you can get all your personal shit sorted out before you get married.

Anyway, forms. They're all filled out. Correctly.

Goober was remarkably placid about it all. When I told him that the adoption was final and he had a new name (at his request - he has Nature Boy's last name now) he just nodded.

"So Daddy is your daddy legally now," I said.

"And my only daddy," Goober added.

He's had remarkably few questions about the whole thing, except for wanting to know why Nature Boy didn't adopt him sooner. And, to be honest, I wasn't terribly honest with him on that front, because the reasons we didn't do this sooner aren't all that good. To wit:

1. We didn't know where my ex was. He disappeared about five years ago and we didn't know where he went. But eventually he stayed in one place long enough to show up on White Pages.

2. We live in a small town where everyone knows everyone else's business, so everyone knew that even though Nature Boy wasn't Goober's real father, Goober thought of him as Daddy, so they'd play along.

3. There are very few things you need to use a birth certificate for when a child is small. As they get older, however, you need a birth certificate for everything. And when the name your child uses doesn't match the name that's on his birth certificate, well...

4. If you want to take your child out of the country, you need both parents to sign for a passport. It's much easier to obtain a passport if you know where both parents are and they are both sober. We didn't plan to take Goober to Europe anytime soon, but he's been asking to visit England someday.

5. To get a drivers license, the name on the drivers license application must match the name on the social security card. Also a problem if the name on the social security card matches the name on the birth certificate that the child does not use. But that's a long ways away.

6. We were cowards. We didn't want to have to deal with my ex and it was just easier to live as if he didn't exist. But, as you can see from the reasons listed above, at some point we do have to acknowledge his existence. And we didn't want the Ubergoober to have to live with that, either.

So we did it. We jumped in because we finally realized that it would just be better to do this now.

And now... now it's over. We have our boy and he is ours.

Goober, with a special "adoption day" present from Grandma.